THE OLD AUSTRIAN GUY

As we made our way through the woods, we suddenly came upon this old Austrian guy walking through the forest in jeans, a white t-shirt and suspenders-- it seemed like he was far away and then all of a sudden he was UPON us and in a loud voice says, "Getish me laden von hoken den she!" We freeze! "Bitish von yonker velder maken yosheneth de mesh?" (Of course obviously this isn't what he exactly said- but it might well have been for as much sense as it makes to me when they start talking German. My reaction of course- walk away! What else! In fact, RUN! Carol's reaction of course, stop, smile that beautiful smile and fold her hands in apology and say, "English??I'm sorry- We speak English..." all the while smiling beautifully at him. Now I, twenty paces at least from this encounter turn around and think, hey- maybe he's NOT going to kill us-----and I hear him say to her, "Ahhhhhh Engleeesh.....yah boiken de bana be kenti pelash de no deutsch!" To which she shakes her head while smiling and says, "Nien Deutsch...sorry..." To which I bravely join in "NODEUTSCH!" By now he is graciously continuing to talk to Carol in German but interspaces some words in English like HOT and Hochosterwitz and BEAUTIFUL to which she nods and agrees and says "its beautiful" at which point he points our way in the woods where we are to go- and waves goodbye. As we continued on like Dorothy on the way to Oz I say to Carol, "What do you think he wanted????" She says, "I think he wanted to tell us that he takes care of the path here to keep it beautiful and what a wonderful place Hochosterwitz is"- I say, "really????" Carol- "Why what do you think he wanted?" "Oh nothing"...